Of course it’s hard, it’s supposed to be

Making a large life change is scary. But do you know what’s even scarier? Regret.

The only thing standing between you and your goals are the bullshit stories you keep telling yourself. In my experience, there are two things that define you: Your patience when you have nothing and the attitude you carry when you have everything. The first step to take to getting anywhere is making the concrete decision that you’re not willing to stay where you are now because honestly, if your dreams don’t scare the shit of you, they’re just not big enough.

Every morning that you wake up, you have two choices to make: Continue to chase your dreams, or wake the fuck up and chase them. As a 23-year old college student, it’s only been a recent revelation that I’ve wanted to pursue medicine as a chosen career path. For a long time, I dabbled in fashion, marketing and nursing. I hit the jackpot when I decided to become a nursing major. I’ve always been good at math and science, and interested in healthcare not because I’m superbly intelligent, I’ve just always spent more time on a problem than another student would. As a nursing major, I went through multiple series self-discovery. Throughout this process, I developed an innate curiosity and a passion to need want to know more about the human body, it’s function and physiology. After entering a pre-medical internship, I quickly learned that nursing wasn’t for me. I was doing it for all the wrong reasons; to have a steady job, a pay that would benefit the lifestyle I wanted to live, working 3 days a week, etc. I didn’t take into consideration how my unhappiness with said “job” would affect the people I was working with, patients but more importantly, my overall well being. My days as a nursing major soon turned into long nights of crying- I hated the thought of knowing, in my heart, that being in that profession wasn’t for me. My unhappiness and dissatisfication affected everything around me; my studies and my personal life. Finally, after receiving a few acceptance letters to nursing school, I decided that I couldn’t sacrifice my happiness for a peripheral feeling of having a steady job. It was an injustice to my mind, body and soul.. My heart. 

Fast forward to 2013, with a new found love for holistic health, nutrition and medicine, I discovered a medical degree called D.O or Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine; the same degree as an MD (you go to conventional medical school, the whole shabang!) but they have chosen to practice more holistically, in the sense of treating the body as a whole, rather than the symptom. Becoming a D.O is somewhat viewed as a whole new faction of medicine. In other terms, not completely accepted by the traditional medicinal minds that have been conformed to what is the “right kind of doctor.” But in my perspective, success follows where passion lies. Do everything with love, and everything that you want will follow. I am not concerned with money, or a status symbol. What’s most important (to me) is to follow your dreams and follow your heart because your mind can often convince you to put off what your heart really wants.. Remember, the expert in anything was once a beginner. I’m 23, a junior at University and never been happier to know that I’m finally pursuing something that makes my heart sing and my soul smile.

So, here are my doctors orders: Be crazy enough to know that you can succeed! Don’t overthink, it kills your happiness. Accept that trial and error is part of failure and it’ll happen often, view it as an opportunity to start over and this time, do it wisely. Be afraid to never try, but not to fail. Accept that the struggle you’re in today is setting you up for the strength you’ll be feeling tomorrow. Don’t compare your chapter 1 to someone else’s chapter 25. Wake up everyday and kick ass. REPEAT.

Be a hero. To yourself.

Xo, T.


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